Thursday, March 09, 2006

Good ideas

From the usual source: "You're right about the theatre problem, however. I had a similar incident with a pre-teen/teen kid sitting behind me during a movie. He kept kicking the back of my chair (little bumps every now and then, from him fidgeting). We asked repeatedly for him to stop, and told him that we would have the managers remove him if he didn't stop. He didn't. Luckily, he was sitting in the last row, and I was in the row in front of him. I simply stood up for a while, and then sat on the seat (folded up) so he couldn't see the movie. Eventually, I sat back down and enjoyed peace and quiet for the rest of the film.

Theatre owners are too easy to offer refunds for bad experiences because they know that the vast majority of people won't ask for refunds. They cut corners by removing the ushers, and offer refunds instead.

Here's a great movie-theater business model (for grown ups):
- Ushers at every isle intersection with 10,000 candlepower flashlights
- No one under 18 allowed (period). [ ok, so this one is controversial; wait until you're over 21, and you'll get this one ]
- No candy sold in hyper-sealed polyurethane 10' baggies
- No old ladies in pairs seated next to each other allowed in the theater during the main showing
- breathalizer entry points: unless it's a comedy, you have to blow a .007 to get in
- Raised walls (cubicle style) surrounding each seat pair (with adjustable arm divider)

There, instant successful theater just add water. Now someone go out there, make it happen and invite me for a critiqual visit."

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